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Now, my highly suspicious mind believes the smell is a marketing strategy, however, it could also be a coincidence, yeah,,,, nah.

I have noticed with a few dairy items I have been buying, the “best before date” is on parts of the packaging which are thrown away or easily removed. If you don’t know what the BBD is, chances are you’ll throw it out before it is time to do so, and you will be buying it again, most probably the same product, but sooner than you would ordinarily do so, therefore the companies are making more money. Dairy products last longer than you think and they sometimes look a bit dodgy before they actually are and you are inclined to ditch it before you really have to.  Take sour cream for example, it always looks a bit creepy with the water component separating, but it is still perfectly fine.  A recent purchase of sour cream, the BBD was printed on the flimsy plastic lid, which broke and I threw out, so after the first use I put it back in the fridge for the next time I have some sneaky Mexican, but when I was having my “fridge scan and throw out before rubbish pick up day”, I noticed it didn’t have a BBD on the container, so to be safe, I threw it out, half used.

My usual yoghurt has had a packaging overhaul recently, they now print the label on a fancy new “peel and reveal” one, which has a kids colouring in picture, fun facts and surprises, true, on the back.  They even have FB & Instagram accounts where you can share, genius!  I don’t even have kids and the first time I got caught out was from my own curiosity.  The entire label peels off and leaves a naked container, disgraceful.  It says “peel and reveal”, I couldn’t help myself, like bubble wrap, it is just asking to be “popped”, annoyed, I put the container back in the fridge, you guessed it, bin night there was still a small amount in there,,,,,knowing full well that it was most probably alright, but as there was no BBD to confirm, I threw it out.  You guessed it, bought some more next shop!

The crumbled feta, yeah, I’m lazy, whatevs, this stuff lasts FOREVER!  But they have just started putting the BBD on the rip off part that you have to snap off to open, it even says to TEAR OFF and presumably ditch it, sneaky!  No chance of this going past it’s BBD at my house as it regularly makes an appearance on my weekend breakfasts, so with this I know I’m good.

So irritating, so to get my own back and not be duped anymore, I am onto them!  Good ol’ sharpie on the remaining, unmovable, non-tearing, non-splitting packaging left, sorts it out.

I hate waste, but, I have had food poisoning a few times, through no fault of my own, and I remember the misery oh so well, so I always err on the side of caution when it comes to food hygiene.  With such busy lives we all lead, you NEVER remember when you bought things let alone how long it’s going to last for. So once again, smells like fish to me!

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There is a sport that seemingly everyone in Australia follows except me.  The Australian Football League.  The AFL season fills me with dread, I think it has only become this bad for me since the inception of social media.  I don’t know what it is, but it truly brings out the arsehole in some people.  Granted, not every supporter seems to glaze over and become so unpalatable, but from my observations, a reasonable number of them do.

Don’t get me wrong, I’d most probably sit through a game instead of poking my own eyes in, but it would be a close call.  Sport is a GREAT thing, it gets kids out and off their butts exercising, and it is a great activity for families to do together and it teaches kids to be part of a team.  I have even had people in my own household watch it, yes, I may have left my own abode at the time to escape the running commentary for which I loudly voice my disinterest having fallen on deaf ears.

I have also been to a few games over the years.  When one gets offered fully catered corporate seating, one has to accept.  I did however once go to a match with my sister, let it be noted that she is a fine upstanding supporter, at Subiaco Oval in Perth, yes, I believe it has some new fandangle shitty name now, but it will always be Subi Oval to me.  I have made it quite clear over the years that I hate this venue, it is old and the lack of facilities fill me with dread every time I have to go near the place.  I foolishly thought I’d buy a stuffed spud for lunch at said game, only to be ridiculed by the spud merchant that they had run out and I should’ve come earlier, IT WAS HALF TIME!  FFS, here’s a concept, make more, sell more, make more profits, support your local spud farmer and make people happy, yeah, I know, out there notion huh?  And the toilets, thank goodness I don’t like the game much as you miss so much of it waiting in line.

I was also on holiday in Melbourne, when two sides who I believe hate each other were playing, the lure of pending biffo and interesting people watching sucked me in.  The MCG is a great venue, and if you are going to do an AFL game, it would be these two teams, let’s say one team is represented by a Magpie and the other, errrrr Charlie “Blue” (thanks Google), at the hollowed turf of the MCG.  It was a great day out, I even managed to get a full strength alcoholic drink, get some tasty food to go with my cherry pie I had bought earlier at a St Kilda cake store and easily go to the toilet in the standard time one would expect.  It was bloody freezing though, it is Victoria after all, however, I was grateful for the portly gent sitting next to me to block the wind.  Poor buggar though, his team was losing, let’s say he supported the birds team and left early, skulking away and leaving me to finish the match chilled to the bone.

What I find distasteful is the sledging of others teams, I find it bullying in behaviour and I have never encountered such a bunch of sore losers.  I get you want to barrack for a team, I truly do, I am team Federer in the tennis after all, however you wont find me posting all over social media what a low life loser scum pathetic piece of shit any losing player is.  Well, I do find Nadal does have a freak arm and picks his butt too frequently, however he is NO loser!  There is no need for viciousness, just accept that your team didnt play as well that week, and congratulate the better team.

I just find it all so mean spirited and it really makes me feel sick.  Some say I have missed the humour and to lighten up, however, I don’t find booing and telling someone they are a loser, amusing.  Fair enough, if the player knocked over a nanna to get to the stuffed spud stall before half time, well, yes, boo away people.  When some mop haired bloke won the individual medal for being a little bit awesome all season, some social media users posted that they were pleased that his team “finally won something”.  Really.  Even with my scant knowledge of all things AFL, I’m pretty sure they were on top of the leader board all year, they just didn’t manage to pull off what was to be their final season game.  I do believe this dude also played his last game with a broken leg, I guess I will have to give AFL players kudos for being tough buggars, this wouldn’t happen in Soccer, yes, it’s called soccer around these parts, those players seem to roll over in agony by a slight breeze of someone running near them whooshing some air.

Another thing that really pisses me off is people from a certain State of Australia bagging out their own states teams?  I get you may go for another team as you have some affiliation with the state or followed another states team before the 2 WA teams came to be, yes, I am a proud West Australian, however, bad mouthing a team from your own state, where you choose to live because it offers you employment and a lifestyle superior to other states is just poor form.

It is frustrating to watch the behaviour of these people, it seems to get even worse when alcohol is involved, drinking is considered part of the culture, I get it, sadly some people think it is their right to get shitfaced drunk when watching this game, hence some ovals only offering mid strength alcohol for sale, sadly some people have even ruined the chance to have a social drink for others.  People from other teams who quietly go about their business get verbally and physically abused for wearing their teams colours or supporters outfits etc.  Fucking disgraceful behaviour.  If someone abused you for being of another sex or race you can be arrested, but it seems perfectly acceptable to abuse someone over their football team, chill the fuck out, sit back and enjoy it if it is your thing.  Back in the day on field assault was socially tolerated and TBH, I don’t mind a bit of it, I get that it isn’t legal though, charged up players letting out their frustrations, but as a supporter to someone minding their own business?  Let me say, you couldn’t pay me enough to be an umpire either, being called a “fucking maggot” every day you work wouldn’t thrill me.

Anyway, if that wasn’t enough, the marketing surrounding Grand Final also irritates me, yeah, I guess it is only one day a year, thank goodness really as we’d all have type 2 diabetes, obesity, alcoholism and a large gambling debt if it weren’t, oh wait…..  Here’s a few snippets from the weekend newspaper.  Sheesh!

Anyway, thank goodness it is done until next year.  I always unfollow a large number of footy following peeps on my FB news feed, as it causes me anxiety, now to make the decision whether to start them up again?  Who needs the negativity, not me!  Until next year, when I have to give people my blank stare and silence when asked to be involved in the footy tipping contest.

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So, I came to the realisation that I have actually been unemployed for SEVEN MONTHS!  I can’t tell you how busy I have been not really achieving anything, it is rather surprising to me!

I have been stewing over something the entire time and really couldn’t be bothered addressing it, it just seemed so dull.  The dreaded resume.  I have never really needed one before as I always obtained employment by word of mouth and I had been previously employed by the same company for 20 years.  Every HR team member or Manager tells me they don’t read them, but you have to submit them when you apply for a job?

URRGGHHHH

Anyway, I am pleased to announce that after thinking about the bloody thing EVERY morning that I wake up, I have finally completed it.  I even abstained from using swear words and emoticons  🙂

I seem pretty friggin awesome on paper, perhaps a little too good to be true?  It was a hard process, as being in my previous position for so long, I just did stuff.  It was time-consuming and bloody boring sitting down and actually thinking about what I did, looking back, I really should’ve been on three salaries!

Anyway, I’m pretty sure no one will actually read it, but it is done.  I guess now I have something to cut and paste on the dreaded Linkedin profile I’ve also been told to set up  :/

*Off to take a suitably professional profile picture*

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So, the French Open has just finished, you know tennis is the only sport I actually enjoy yeah?  So here’s the thing, clay just doesn’t float my boat, not really sure why, hard court and grass, yes?  I wonder if it is something to do with Nadal winning everything on clay for a while and subconsciously his butt picking ways put me off.  I don’t think I have ever liked it?  I do however one day want to go to Roland Garros and check it out, I think I need to go there and buy one of those poxy hats they all seem to wear.  You’ll be able to pick me out in the crowd, I’ll be the tourist wearing sunnies and no name brand clothing, why don’t Europeans wear sunnies?  I hope the joint doesn’t collapse before I get there, looks like a bit of a dump, you’d think someone would give the walls a once over with a pressure cleaner before the event?

I do however have to commend whoever allowed the ball kids to wear Adidas this year though.  FRICKIN AWESOME outfit for the ball girls.  I would wear this as everyday wear, LOVE it!  Would have to say the best I have ever seen.

Triple striper knee highs and that pleated skirt are awesome.  The shoes, did you see the shoes?

This is almost enough of a marketing victory to get me back into the sport, or at least to buy the entire outfit and leave in a cupboard never to be worn?

I don’t really enjoy the women’s finals as a rule.  Yes, I am a fan of Serena Williams, but she usually wins in straight sets and it’s all over in a very short amount of time.  However, she had to work her neon covered arse off this time, it was great to see.  She lost the plot there for a while and got very cross with herself, but she got the job done, eventually.  Her unforced error stats were up there with mine, if you don’t know what an unforced error is, just a fancy term for a fuckup!  I also loved her fashion choice, this can’t always be said for this feisty lass.  Fluro leopard print, yes please!  I am not sure who the Village of The Damned wannabe in her box was either, must google later.  Interesting to note in her press conference, Serena wore a nice blue crocheted top?  True!  BTW, she played Lucie Safarova, yeah, only thing interesting about her is she is a leftie.

The Frenchies have disabled the embedding feature of youtube, so you’re gonna have to click to open  :/ Women’s Final highlights with Village of The Damned dude evidence

Men’s final, well, what can I say, I had to go for Novak Djokovic even with his weird hair as he was playing Stan Wawrinka, bloody Stan who beat my Rog, AGAIN!  Bloody Stan with the dodgy shorts.  I had to go for Novak, he is my sister’s choice, if I can’t go for my choice I usually go for hers, also the fact that he beat Nadal AND Murray to get to the final, AND believe it or not he has never won the French Open.  I blame the shorts, put Novak off his game, bloody Stan!

Mens Highlights with dodgy short action

See how they positioned this photo, with Stan’s shorts hidden by the net!  Not just me it seems!

In other news, 21 more sleeps ‘til Wimbledon!

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Nice to receive this now,,,,

TBH, I would’ve just deleted it anyway,,,,it mentions school fees  😉

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Hello!  I’m here, I’m here!  I am alive and well, but BUSY!  It seems that being an unemployed bum is incredibly hard work and I’ve never been so friggen busy!  It is amusing however, it takes a situation about men opening their legs to get me to write.

So, it, has a name, it, being something that really pisses me off!  I’ve seen, it, for a while, I’ve chatted to BFF’s about it, and I’ve even had several Facebook posts about it.

MANSPREADING

I didn’t realise it had a name until the other day, I didn’t know it was so prevalent.  Recently two gents were arrested for it.  It was on the ABC, it must be true, please God, make this true!  There should be more of it!

The situation has become so dire that they now have posters about it in New York.  Those New Yorkers have stepped up a peg in my mind.

I know you don’t have balls the size of coconuts, and if indeed you do and you’re catching public transport on the way to your surgeon, well, please forgive me, but, I’m pretty sure you don’t.  It doesn’t really worry me too much if there is plenty of space, and if you want to be an arrogant seat hogging arsehole, well, I’m kinda OK with it, I don’t want some peeps sitting next to me either.  However, when we all need to fit in the same space, move ya fucking legs!  Why should I have to have you press up against me?  Why should I have to feel uncomfortable?  Why should I have to ask the obvious?

I live in the country so I don’t catch public transport much, however I do travel a lot and I have seen it in every state of Australia, I haven’t focused in on it overseas as my thoughts are more consumed with figuring out where the hell I am and where I need to get off and am I heading in the right direction.  It has only happened to me once where I have had to have a word with a manspreading gent.  When we travel to our capital city from my home city, we have to travel in a smaller airplane which requires an aerobus from the airport apron to the terminal and return.  We need to fit an entire plane load of peeps on that bus, so if there are two seats, they need two people using them.  I went to go and sit on a seat and there he was, a seat hogging manspreading arsehole!  I immediately wanted to sit elsewhere, but my brain switched to “how dare he” mode, he’s not intimidating me, I’m not too sure of my words, but something along the soft lines of “hey, can you shuffle over?”  He did,,,,not enough mind you, I think half of my arse cheek was hanging off the edge, bearing in mind I’m an average sized female.  I know I asked politely, not sure why I had to as it was glaringly obvious, I wanted to say “close ya fucking legs arsehole”.  I do believe a bit of RedundantK elbow action may have come into play, I have a knack of using my elbow to provide myself with well-deserved personal space, I don’t jab it, I just place it  😀  It has been very useful over the years at music events, I can’t stand a “Johnny come lately” trying to stand in front of me to see a favourite band, if you wanted to be in front, get there earlier than me, I won’t have a problem, I’d be happy to stand behind you!

Anyway, back to the leg spreading chumps!  I guess some women don’t notice, or are intimidated and don’t say anything and I am fully aware not ALL men do this.  I also think that most of the culprits don’t even know they are doing it, most guys don’t have a clue about others personal space or surroundings, fact, by the way.  I’m sure, having balls the size of footballs would give you an excuse to sit like this, or if indeed you are catching public transport to your chiropractor to have your displaced hip sorted.  But,,,,DUDE,,,, STOP THE SPREAD!

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So, it turns out I am the WORST consumer ever, no surprise there I guess.  I’m that person supermarket chains hate as I don’t get sucked into their nonsense or over purchase because the shops are closed for one extra day.  I didn’t buy one Easter egg or even one packet of hot cross buns, even though I’ve had ample opportunity since January when they appeared on the shelves, not one.  I didn’t even succumb to the mindset of stocking up on booze as on Good Friday the pubs and booze outlets are closed.  I didn’t even have any Cadbury crème eggs, this may be difficult to believe for some of you, but I swear this is a true story!  I did however think of them, and their gooey innards, a lot!

I was horrified at the amount of Easter eggs some kids were given, horrified!  WTF?  Thanks to Facebook I was made aware of this.  One we used to get, one!  I do also believe we got a small one if we went to church, hehehe, bribery at its best Catholic Church!  I guess with so many split families a few would even be acceptable, but a table full?  Fucking madness!

I don’t really remember the point of when we were visited by the Easter Bunny to when we placed our order with mum and dad?  I do however recall the tough decision to make when I was a child, there were really only two choices to make, either the Humpty Dumpty Egg or the Elegant Rabbit.  It really was a gut wrenching decision, which taught us to deal with the decision we made.  The novelty of the humpty egg with his elastic attachment, but to *BOING* him and hit the ground just enough to break it but still keep everything contained in the foil wrapper was an art.  The beanies were the treat inside, you gotta remember when I was a kid there were no such things as kinder surprises and things inside things, we knew the beanies were inside but it was still a treat all the same.  Then the elegant rabbit, it was bigger and sometimes the ears and base were thick with chocolate, so the lure of greater chocolate volume was the deal maker here, but no novelty factor or no beanies!  What about those freaks that used to get the candy egg?  A coloured sugar and water egg?  Why?

I remember back in the day when some cousins visited, they were given a standard chocolate bar, a chocolate bar.  *BLINK BLINK*  I thought at the time that they were totally duped, ripped off, surely the Easter Bunny knew they were on holidays, surely he shares the same tracking skills as Santa?  Now when I think back about it, they most probably got more grams of chocolate than us with our fandangled treats.

It was nice to hang out with some peeps though over the Easter break as it was long enough for people to travel.  I have 4 day weekends every weekend at the moment, so the pleasure of such things no longer is there, it was nice to see others relish the time off though.  School holidays are here too I believe, time to hibernate at home for the next two weeks, I wished IGA or Coles home delivered in my city for times like this.  I did do well this morning however, it has been raining for two days, so I went in when the shops opened in the rain, what bliss, straight through the checkouts, yes, plural, you always have to go to two or 3 shops to get what you want around here, I got decent car parks too!

Oh, I believe there is some other reason behind Easter, but all I saw was chocolate, so if the other reason is your thing, I hope you enjoyed it and it filled you with whatever makes you happy.  For all those who did over indulge in the sweet poison, I hope that your moods and insides are back to normal!

Anyway, until next time, I’ll be parked up on the couch watching Judge Judy  🙂

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