December 2014 – Redundant K

Methinkies they call this time of the year the SILLY SEASON because of people’s silly desire to get somewhere first and their silly idea that they are the only ones on the road or their silly notion that they don’t have to obey road rules? Slow the fuck down people!

Recently I had the great displeasure of being involved in a car accident, on my very last day of work, in a crash of absolutely no fault of my own, yeah, the timing right? I learned a very valuable lesson that day, vehicle 5 star safety ratings are a good thing and concentrating solely on driving your car can minimise injury should something happen. My car was a write off and my body although battered and bruised was not. One more trip to the physio before Christmas and I am as good as new,,,well, as good as I am going to get!

I learned a few valuable lessons:

Vehicle 5 star safety ratings are a great idea, anti-lock braking systems and crumple zones are there for a reason.
Airbags and seat belts are awesome, they do a great job, however it is like being kicked by an obstreperous mule.
Driving sensibly and doing everything right does not always work out for the best when other people are about.
Having AGREED value on your motor vehicle insurance is well worth the extra few dollars a year.
Having the Police and Ambulance involved makes for a far easier claim process.
Some people are still arseholes, a person nearly run me over after the crash when it was pretty obvious people were hurt but I guess some people just need to get to where they are going in a hurry?
Some people restore your faith in humanity. I had a lovely couple come to my rescue after the crash and come forward as witnesses to the Police and stay with me until my husband arrived and Ambulance had seen me.
I was very bloody lucky, it could have been far worse!

So, all I can ask once again is, slow the fuck down! I have been to the shops every day this past week in the lead up to Christmas day, there is still plenty of food in there, there is still plenty of fuel in the bowsers and there is still enough room on the roads to get where you are going. If you can’t chillax whilst driving and find yourself on edge, add this classic to your playlist, Leo Sayer – You make me feel like dancing, there is NO WAY you can get shitty and stressed singing to this pearler! Please keep both hands on the wheel during “WHOOAH” part though 🙂

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I cannot stand dodgy claims by the big companies marketing departments and shonky shit for the consumer! I guess it is all the clearer this time of year, the dreaded Christmas Holidays. I love Christmas, it’s a great time of the year to spend with the family,,,,,as I actually really like my family. I guess it would kinda suck if you were related to a bunch of arseholes. I was raised a Catholic, but do not practice Catholicism, but I get all the peeps who are religious and celebrate this time of the year to do what religious peeps do, regardless of the religious denomination they choose.

But to me it seems, that everywhere you look it’s all about a sales ploy. I made the decision a few years ago not to do a blanket Christmas pressie buy up as we feel pressured into buying gifts at this time of the year due to rampant consumerism and devious marketing strategies and the oversupply of brightly coloured junk mail pamphlets. I buy for a very select group of old school friends, and their kids, YES, even though I don’t like kids much, some of them are sorta cute and someone has to buy them their stick on tattoos and inappropriate clothing, yes? TBH, if I bought any of the crap they have advertised I would suspect my family and friends wouldn’t speak to me anyway.

I prefer to celebrate friends and family Birthdays instead. It makes it more personal than buying for the sake of buying, there is more than enough crap on this earth that ends up in landfills because of, why I don’t know, just because.

The other day I saw some large brightly coloured “savings” tags on some items lined up at the checkout section of a local supermarket, (like I’m going to fall for the old “let’s line up a heap of unwanted shit the consumer may have forgotten to get whilst walking down the aisle” trick) with a whopping ten cents off a $16 item,,,,ten fucking cents? Wow, don’t go all out national supermarket manager! I guess people in a rush or god forbid shopping with a child just don’t concentrate and grab it as it was “on sale”

I have said before, I am glad I don’t follow fashion as I really don’t care what I wear, if it is a classic item you can wear it year in year out. I guess my 80’s rah rah skirt was the exception, you live and learn. I also don’t get people who buy high end label items, yes, I MAY have a few said items, but have learnt that I don’t really care nor does anyone else. I do believe there is ONE exception to this rule, a decent bra! Get on it ladies, you know who you are! To steal some words from Macklemore & Ryan Lewis;

They be like “Oh Gucci – that’s hella tight”

I’m like, “Yo, that’s fifty dollars for a T-shirt”

Limited edition, let’s do some simple addition

Fifty dollars for a T-shirt – That’s some ignorant bitch (shit)

I call that getting swindled and pimped (shit)

I call that getting tricked by a business

http://https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QK8mJJJvaes

Anyhoo, 16 more sleeps until Christmas for which I shall eagerly await our family tradition of having a small portable Christmas tree which gets handed around the dinner table, of which my Mother attaches Christmas themed lottery scratchies to and my Father exclaiming “it’s rigged, you should never buy them this time of year”, much to many an eye roll and grab in the hope that we COULD be winners from said “rigged” scratch cards! Surely gambling isn’t a marketing scam? 😉 Hmmm, even if I’m a willing participant? *SIGH*

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Month: December 2014

SLOW THE F**K DOWN!

16 more shopping days until Christmas!